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21january2018

>01:41

 

i am feeling strong about my commitment to these formats. i have been over-thinking a lot of things for a very long time, but i think i am sure of enough things that within this week, i will be able to… be what i want to be. as cheesy as that may be. i don’t speak in rhyme all the time. but when i do, i don’t do it for long… unless for a song… but even then i’m not that great at it. so, i am grateful for the space i have here – in my little piece of this whole place. the internet. the world. the everything else. i guess i’m here. whether you all like it or not. so. yeah.

i don’t know. somethings but i do know other things.

anyways… what i was going to say- i just made some changes to the site, using a temporary pre-made matrix looking wordpress theme for now but i plan on ditching and designing my own from scratch within the week… that’s what i meant to say… then i went into all that rubbish.

imalssohiforthelasttimeinatleast3monthsshhhdonttellnobody.

<01:48

 

>13:21

just about 12 hours later and i’m still feeling good. i got up relatively early, but only cuz i had to take el amor de mi vida to work. still, i plan to use that as a solid kickstart to a week of waking up early – in prep for my first semester back to school in about a year. i went to community college for a few semesters after i dropped out of berklee school of music, but it was a buncha random general classes with no focus – and i still just despise the public education system, so i sorta dropped out again. but this time i’m going back to college (not community, apparently) with a specific skill in mind that i want to acquire – computer programming – and only 2 classes focusing on some fundamental languages, Java and C++, so i have no more excuses for distractions, over-worked loads or, and probably most importantly, lack of interest. because this is something that really interests me and i think this is truly my last shot at school. i plan to attend throughout this calendar year (2 classes this spring semester + 3 classes the following fall semester) and that should land me with a certificate in computer science. not quite a degree, but it’s something. and i really don’t want a degree. my parents want me to get a degree, and i should appease them for everything they do, but as silly as this may sound, i really feel like i can them prouder with a bigger level of success without a degree – and instead aiming to change bigger things like how the world looks at education. again, it’s silly dreams like this that are pretty dumb to have for someone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning – but i’m working on it.

anyways, i am going to be going to school with el amor de mi vida for the first time. i think it’s gonna be pretty cool, and just last night i had the idea of starting a seperate blog for the both of us to start our own blog to document what it’s like for people our age to go to school right now and be taught by others, vs. teaching ourselves. so we’ll be writing about our classes at school, as well as making up our own weekly classes where i’ll be teaching her what i know about recording music, and she’ll be teaching me what she knows about dancing… to music. so that should be fun. and we’ll have a final project in May and a syllabus and the whole shebang. so look out for all that. should be some good stuff coming up.

oh, also i needa figure out how to upload drawings to here and start doing that every day…

 

<13:36